WE ARE CNQ, DUKE’S ONLY INTENTIONALLY HUMOROUS PUBLICATION! SURE, WE’VE BEEN LAYING LOW FOR A FEW YEARS, LIVING UNDER THE RADAR LIKE OSAMA, BUT NOW WE’RE BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER!  WE DEDICATE OUR LIVES TO MAKING YOU LAUGH. WELL, MAYBE NOT OUR ENTIRE LIVES, BUT DEFINITELY LIKE A SOLID 3 HOURS, 14 REDBULLS, 3 EIGHTBALLS OF CRACK/COCAINE, AND ONE ISSUE OF THE CHRONICLE (JUST SO WE HAVE SOMETHING TO LAUGH AT). WE SLAVE AWAY TO CREATE JOKES THAT WILL KEEP YOU ENTERTAINED, ENLIGHTENED, AND...UH...ENTERTAINED? DID I SAY THAT ALREADY? OH WELL, THAT’S WHAT WE DO.